I’m gonna be somebody someday…-Travis Tritt

Summer, meaning no more school, started about 3 weeks ago but with me doing summer school I really haven’t thought about starting my summer reading till today.  So tonight I sat down to officially start my “screens off” time and really start reading a book that was given to me for my birthday called, The Resolution for Women.  A little background info on this book is that this book is the tie in book to the movie Courageous where the men in the movie make a resolution to their families to me honorable men of God, Godly husbands and fathers, I became acquainted with it when the men in my church did a book study on it and one Wednesday night they signed the resolution.  Well I came across this  book when I was looking for my friend Stacie’s birthday present, but knowing I still have 2 other books I had bought and not touched yet I need to read first I decided it wise not to purchase it, also since I was neither a wife or mother I figured it wasn’t for me.  Exactly a week later my lovely friend Kara gave it to me for my birthday and wrote a note inside it saying that when she started searching for the perfect gift for me this book kept coming to mind.  Tonight I sat down and read part one of the section titled This is who I am, by the end of the chapter I was hooked and felt like I had been slapped in the face. the good kind, the kind that gives you a wakeup call.

Every bite counts

     They author started talking about as she was coming up on a birthday and a friend had told her that this next year was a good year, the author started thinking about how she had fanatically passed through her life to get to the next point, rushed through childhood to get to young adulthood, single college student to get to married life, while she did enjoy her first years of marriage, she did harbor discontement with childlessness, the when the children came she would count the hours till bed time and so on and so on.  As I read that I realized how much that was what I was doing in my own life.

I loved my childhood but always dreamed to be older and dreamed my wedding day and having babies, and I always saw myself as a young bride but when I got to college I never saw myself settling down, those dreams were set on the back burner.  That was a good thing because that was the last time I was content of where I was in my life, I loved being college and somewhat unattached (yes I would have love to been in a relationship but I had great friends who were single so I didn’t spend a whole lot of time thinking about it) and very little responsibility, and also my parents also told me that I got married in college paying for college would become my responsibility so it was in my best interest to wait and plus they would always say there was no rush.  Nevertheless that all changed the day I graduated college, I had my life planned to a “t”, I would find a teaching job to start that fall( I was still holding out a twinge of hope I would get hired at the school I did my student teaching at, but with the district opening a new school to reduce the student numbers at this school which in turn meant the school  had to cut staff [most being sent to one of the 2 new elementary campus opening the next fall] that dream of quickly dying), with my career off and going I was going to find Mr. Perfect and get married within the next 2 years and within the next 2 years the babies would come.  Well if you have been reading my blog for a while you know that’s not how it went.

When I was reading the book tonight I realized that for since I graduated college I have been eagerly been waiting for this season of my life to pass, and pass quickly.  I NEVER planned for season to last so long, I haven’t enjoyed it or taken advantage of it.  During this time in my life I could have traveled more, learned new things, experienced new things.  However in my warped little brain I kept thinking that once I’m married my life will start!  We can travel, doing new things together, really live life.  What the heck what I thinking?! Why can’t I travel by myself, I mean I don’t need a chaperone, what if my husband doesn’t what to do something things I want to do?  Plus shouldn’t I have some life experience before I get married?  Or am I just going to be the same old boring person I am now, safely tucked away in my isolation bubble.  Sometimes I bore myself waiting for prince charming to show up and whisk me away to start my life.  Tonight I wanted to slap myself and say ahh hey idoit, your life is going on already and join it won’t ya!

It’s funny just before I started reading the book tonight I was at Barns & Noble and I walked passed their map section and I just wanted to buy all the ones for the places I wanted to visit, not only in the states like Nashville, New Orleans, parts of North Carolina, Boston, Maine, but also overseas like, Italy, Pairs, England, Ireland, Spain.  After reading just this part of the book I want to start planning my travels right away.

Each section ends with questions to make you think and though out this blog I have answered the first 3 but the last one poses the question “what can you do differently today to gather up all the good things around you and beginning the journey of your life?” Well I am going to rejoin my life, stop waiting for a man make my dreams come true and to be with me to accomplish my goals, and start planning on trips and taking the classes I’ve always wanted to take.  Become CONTENT in this season, because one day this season will over and I will look back one day and wish I could have it back.

Godliness accompanied with contentment (that contentment which is a sense of [a]inward sufficiency) is great and abundant gain.-1 Timothy 6:6 (AMP)

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